Aspergers Syndrome And Being Socially Appropiate

Wow, this is a doozy. Being socially Appropiate with Aspergers. What the heck is considered socially Appropiate? After a lot of work, research, searching what it might be with friends, etc. I’ve achieved an odd level of socially Appropiate. I can kinda pull it off for a little while when I am around new people, but the way I am isn’t stereotypical socially Appropiate. I used to love to “toy” with telemarketers. I got in trouble with my mom for that, because they’re just doing their job. My new approach may baffle telemarketers even more so than my old approach. I tell them all about their product in ten seconds and what product is better then theirs. I then tell them that “I am sorry, but I can’t help answer your questions. I wish you the best of luck calling people and getting the right answers for your job.” i am greeted with complete silence on the other end of the line, so I just say in a very cheerful voice “BYE!”. I hung up and my Mom informed me that wasn’t rude or mean, but it wasn’t the normal way people talk to telemarketers. Yeah, that telemarketer was very confused. I am able to tell you all about environmental stuff that doesn’t use gas, so when you call me saying you have something that makes the air cleaner, well, I am going to tell you a better product.

Telemarketers are just one area of appropriateness, you are supposed to be appropriate with everyone. That is currently impossible to reach. I am myself. I try to be appropriate, but telling someone how many gray hairs they have or counting people’s wrinkles out loud isn’t appropriate. I am improving a lot in those areas!!!! I still have trouble telling when someone is being mean or what a joke is. This lady was really mean and nasty in my opinion, but I’ve been informed that I didn’t get a social cue. Some lady almost crushed our groceries with hers and said something like “oh, that’s funny” and made an odd laugh.. Not a haha laugh or a sad laugh, an odd laugh. I replied with my literal mind and a frown on my face and told her “no, its not.” the lady got quite upset and stormed away from me to the other side of the cash register and loaded her groceries without saying a word. I wasn’t quite, I was upset that she thought it was so funny that she almost destroyed our groceries. Apparently by saying it was funny and the odd laugh, was sometype of odd apology ritual. The lady apparently felt bad, but didn’t want to just say “I almost destroyed all your food. Sorry.”……….. Okay…… Whatever. There are so many freaking social cues and Appropiate behaviors that it gets highly complex!!!!!!!!! I’ve been told not to talk about politics, because that makes people mad. I don’t care if they get mad, I love a good debate and if the other person is so narrow minded that they can’t even debate their views against mine, well, no wonder we have some senators that we have. You’re not supposed to talk religion either. I talk religion when I deem it is Appropiate. I love correcting one of my friends who is an athiest and sometimes doesnt take the time to read the bible, so said person uses it out of context. Once they said something like “Adam And Eve were never married, so why should gay marriage be illegal?” I am not against gay marriage, I am about equal rights. I have a friend who is gay and friends whose brothers are gay, heck being gay is just caused by a change in a gland and the hemispheres in the mind. Anyways, when my friend posted this incorrect statement, I pointed her to the correct area where she could find out that Adam and eve were married. That probably wasn’t appropriate to correct a friend on a social network, but they posted the statement so I thought it was logical to correct their illogic logic.

My point is, no I am not your normal social Appropiate person, but I am not an Internet troll and I love a good debate. Debating is arguing that has a point to it. No one with Aspergers or PDD-NOS is “normal” and that’s great!!! I feel really bad for people who are normal. They’re trapped inside some type of box…. It is apparently a metaphor, but I don’t even think outside this box, I think so differently that I’ve never even seen the box!!! I hope you’re not in the box, because upon investigation those who think inside this box are the most miserable people when it comes to work. I haven’t heard of anyone escaping the box, but there is always a first!!

Does anyone else relate to anything I said? Or does it just seem like a rant? It isn’t a rant. I am just explaining odd things that happen that have to do with social cues and how people think so narrowly and how narrow thinking isn’t logical.

9 thoughts on “Aspergers Syndrome And Being Socially Appropiate

  1. Danni says:

    I have to say I agree with everything you have written here…
    What is considered normal depends upon whom you ask.

  2. Jennifer says:

    I love your descriptions of “the Box”. I can even see how being in the box can be soficating to Aspies like my daughter. And she makes good arguements to me about why she is not doing things like everyone else. I agree with her on some points, but in order to make her teachers happy and get rewards, most of the time she has to be “Boxed”. I am going to let her have more independent time from now on when she gets home.

    • I am glad my descriptions were helpful. This may come as a surprise, but I can go on about the “box” for an hour at a time. The “box” is one reason we will always have wars. Being “boxed” is the worst thing in the world. Thankfully, I am not boxed.

  3. Kiley says:

    I’ve been wondering lately whether I have Asperger’s, and this particular blog seems to be quite parallel to my own, piling more evidence that supports that theory. There were numerous times when I would often find myself in such social situations and respond in what the society deems as a response of negative quality in regards to the standard level of social appropriateness. I love a good debate as well, and would often find myself engaged in the activity whenever possible. I definitely understand what you are conveying in this blog, and I am happy to know that I am not the only person that goes through this.

    • Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Our society is made up of people who are on a different intellectual plateau than us. I presume that is why society deems what appears to be appropriate behavior as innapropiate behavior. Would you mind providing a link to your blog?

  4. Rosie says:

    I recently was diagnosed with AS as a mature female, married with two adult children. It was instant relief to the missing pieces of my oddly wired brain. that I must say, “I LOVE”.
    So in AS fashion, I have spent endless hours and days researching . You have posted the first writings that pique my interest and that I am responding to. You make sense like I think of how things make sense. I love it, It’s simple.

  5. Roxanne k. says:

    I can totally relate made me laugh sounds like me

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